I didn't know the answer was so simple...

I may have mentioned before that Mark looooves shoes. And not just in an everyday "Oh, I got a new pair of shoes -- how exciting!" way. No, more like, I can get this child to do anything I want by merely promising him new shoes. (Don't worry, I use my powers for good.)

And that love is not limited to sneakers. This week he was thrilled to start soccer again, because it meant he'd get new cleats.

He was putting on his new cleats, and mentioned offhand how much he adored them. "My cleats are so great!" he told me wistfully, sliding his foot in ever so carefully.

"I'm glad you like them," I said.

"I love them," he corrected. "They are perfect!" And then, just to drive the point home, he said, "Perfect shoes equal a perfect life."

I bit my lip so I wouldn't laugh out loud at that one. I'm sure my mom (and friend Monica) agree with him.

"That's all it takes?" I asked. "A pair of shoes to make you completely happy?"

"Yep," he answered. "That's it. If I have the perfect shoes, my life is perfect."

"Well, that's a pretty easy fix, then," I replied.

"Well, perfect except for one thing..."

"What's that?"

He scrunched up his face. "Well, I still get in trouble." He relayed a story from second grade, when he got a new pair of shoes and was so excited, he couldn't stop tapping them on the floor during class. His teacher stopped him -- more than once -- and called them Mark's "trouble shoes."

But even that wasn't enough to dampen Mark's new-cleat joy. "I won't get in trouble with these," he promised. Then he smiled, and I realized those shoes really did make him feel like life was perfect.

Which I love. Maybe life really is just that simple. Maybe I'm overthinking and overcomplicating it.

And maybe I'll hit the shoe stores this weekend, too...

New shoes

Last week, I took Mark shoe shopping. The boy was positively giddy -- he LOVES shoes, and the prospect of new kicks sent him into hyperdrive.

Inside the store, I measured his feet and set him free. Before I could blink, he had four boxes of shoes spilling out onto the floor beside him.

He tried on the first pair, black skater shoes. He smiled with appreciation, then took off running down the aisle. "Pretty good," he admitted, then ran back.

The second pair sported white leather with a red and black skull on the side. I honestly thought he'd choose these, because he loves skulls, and any clothing items that feature skulls. But then he saw the third pair, and he immediately dropped the white pair right into the aisle.

I thought he was joking with the third pair. They looked like low-top Converse shoes, which wasn't surprising (he'd just outgrown his Converse shoes). What surprised me was the color:

"These are tight!" he yelled, and shoved them on as quickly as possible. He couldn't stop smiling.

And that's when I broke into a cold sweat. I have a natural aversion to anything too pink or too girly, and I'd thought having a son protected me from all that.

But I broke into a cold sweat for another reason as well. I always imagined I'd let my son be an individual, and that I would love him for exactly who he is. But this...these pink shoes...this was confirmation of exactly who he really is, and it scared me.

That's right, my worst fear was being realized. I couldn't hide from the truth, and I couldn't protect my son from who he is any longer. It pains me to admit it, especially here in a public forum, but turns out Mark is...gulp...another attention-grabbing Dinsdale.

I guess it shouldn't shock me. I've spent the last three years immersing him in our family, a loud, crazy bunch, with nary a shrinking violet in the lot. Of course he's going to pick shoes that stand out and make people notice him.

Personally, I don't care what color his shoes are, I just didn't want to waste my money.

"Those are the shoes you want?" I asked.

"Yes!" he cried.

I picked up a similar pair that were brown with pink stitching and trim.

"How about this pair?" I asked. "They have pink in them, too, just not as much."

But I couldn't sway him. He wanted the pinks, and held tightly to them.

"Fine," I said. "I just want you to be sure. I'm not buying another pair if people make fun of these, so be sure."

He was. He got a mischievous little glint in his eye and said, "I like to shock my friends. I can't wait until Gabi sees these!"

And so he walked out of the store proudly, strutting in his new hot pink shoes.

I followed behind him, admonishing him to tie his shoes. I was proud of my little man, who wears what he likes, and isn't afraid of what other people say.

And then I shuddered for exactly the same reason, as visions of class clowns, smarmy retorts, and being the center of attention filled my head.

Just what the world needs...another Dinsdale who loves the spotlight!