Hallmark's got competition

Mark had an assignment in computer lab to create a card using words and clip-art. I was the lucky recipient, and I smiled at the sweet picture on the front.

"You know it's not my birthday, right?" I asked.

"I know," he said. "But I wanted to make you a card."

"OK, just checking." I opened the card as Mark watched on, holding his breath expectantly.

I realized why -- the inside was filled with digs at my age.


He burst into laughter. "Yeah, Mom -- you've had FORTY birthdays!" he laughed. "I almost couldn't keep track!"

I laughed too, and swatted at him playfully. "Just you wait, mister," I warned. "Some day, you'll be old too, and your kids will mock you."

"Now look at the back," he ordered, so I flipped the card around.


This one I didn't get as quickly.

"I don't get it," I said.

He shrugged. "No one wants to see a grown man cry," he answered simply.

I thought the picture meant because someone had done the man wrong, or something happened to him -- nope, it was just that no one wants to see a grown man crying, according to the cardmaker.

"Well, thank you," I said. "It's a very nice card -- even if you're just being mean to old people and grown men."

His smile vanished. "Hey!" he cried out. "I was being nice -- I made the card for you!"

The funny thing is, it was true. It's about as sweet and sentimental as we get in our house. None of those foofy, flowery "I love you" cards for us -- why just say "I love you" when you can also say "I love you, you're old, and I'm not, nah nah nah nah nah?" I like a funny, sarcastic card that makes me laugh.

And apparently, so does my son.